Life generally lays down some petty and trivial looking hurdles when things are running smoothly! This little offering of challenges comes along just to remind us that we are alive and living! They are also there to teach us about our judgement and strength of character. So when someone I have had to completely remove any expectations from for almost two decades chooses to use a sentence structure on me saying “I’m disappointed in you…” I find I must quickly and violently bite my tongue! Instantly, of course, I realize that it fucken hurts and not because his words actually mean anything to me or to my feelings but because I actually had to physically bite my tongue to stop myself retaliating like a crazed-psycho-woman! But let’s be honest here, I am also disappointed! I’ve been disappointed for years! But not in myself or in him – I’m just disappointed that a kick-arse meteor hasn’t plummeted out of the sky and landed on this douche bags head – just like the boulders that get ole’ Wile E. Coyote with love from the Roadrunner – I don’t want to hurt him but maybe it would knock some sense into him! But yes he is disappointed in me?! I’d love to show him what disappointment looks like, in fact someone get me a mirror so I can hold it up for him!!
I do know that as an enlightened Superwoman being kind and sweet to people and getting along with everyone, holding hands and singing koombayah is a natural ability but seriously … And I mean this in the nicest possible way this person is a so far away from any type of ‘superness’ that it makes me wonder how he’s even breathing! In fact this person is like the villain in my comic book story. Everyone has at least one villain. Some have more than others and some will deny they have any at all. Some of them are in our lives to challenge us, some to test our character and our beliefs but some are just here to remind us how lucky we are not to be born with a big ‘L’ on our forehead!
The best thing about being a superhero though is at the end of the story – unless I am injected with kryptonite, brain washed and then tortured with a feather – I am pretty well guaranteed that I’ll remain on the right side of “good”. When a Superhero vs. a Villain you know the Superhero will be the defending champion, the one who proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that good conquers evil every time. Not with their ego but with their ability to forgive, accept and move on. So, being a disappointment to this ‘bad guy’ really means about as much as one cent does in a candy store – once upon a time it would of bought him something now it’s not worth the bubblegum you’ve stepped on.
I know that villains and superheroes, fairy tales and fables are all just “stories” and this is not the end of the story with my villain but it’s certainly a chapter closed and another lesson learned! But it doesn’t help the fact that I should probably go get some ice on my tongue … Before I bleed out!