Push it, push it real good …. And then run like hell!!!

I have buttons. In fact I have a lot of buttons and if you press the right ones then good things will happen – not just for me but for you too! You’ll get to experience the happy, fun-loving and smiley Cristy. You’ll get to feel the full force of my love, my friendship and I will do anything to get a smile out of you. But then there are these other buttons … Other buttons I wouldn’t even mess with…

push it!

And then there are those kind of people who just can’t do anything other than push the bad ones! I have one particular person in my life that knows all my buttons and knows even better the bad ones, how to push them, how often to push them, which ones to push first in order to get the best response and then usually finishes me off by pushing the ‘I’m-smirking-at-you-right-now-just-so-you-feel-really-stupid’ button…. The worst thing about my button pusher is that he lives under my roof which gives my precious buttons a insane daily workout…. And no it’s not my husband surprisingly, but in fact my 12 year old son!

I swear he walked right out of my womb with a mud map of which buttons I had and where they were located. If there is a line and I tell him not to cross it he will hover his foot above that line and then in slow-motion place his big toe down til it’s resting right on the edge of the line but not over it and then ask “What line?” *cue his smirking button pushing* He hasn’t officially crossed the line now has he?! If he wasn’t so darn big I would send him back up into my womb until he decided to toe the line … Properly!

He is what I would call a serial-pusher because he has the entire family, from the littlest to the biggest, on high alert. Within seconds of his arrival he has at least one person ready for a straight jacket or a bunch of Tequila slammers, yes including my 8 month old who is really beginning to like Tequila in his bottle… I am certain though that beneath my 12 year olds desire to drive everyone in his family nuts that there is a loving heart lurking somewhere  there and his button pushing activities are a force way beyond his control… Like maybe in a past life he was an Elevator Operator, one who never took a day off in his entire 50 year career….

Surely as a Superwoman I would have a super strategy to deal with this past life behaviour! In fact I should be able to karate chop the shit out of every move he makes to touch mine or anyone else’s buttons…  If I truly had superhero powers I’d be made of steel therefore rendering his antics powerless because my buttons would be untouchable…. Unless he had kryptonite – damn you kryptonite! So I am busting the myth that our children are our little darlings, that they never do anything wrong and that they are golden! I love the kid but he drives me cra-a-a-zzy!

Who pushes your buttons? Tell me your strategies to deal with them……….. Please! *begging*whimpering*

One Love,

DRK xxx